FAMILY TIME IS QUALITY TIME

This weekend Helene and I participated in a surprise party for my uncle Terry’s 60^th birthday.  My uncle Terry grew up in a home with five brothers and one adopted sister who had Down syndrome.  Terry was the youngest with my dad being the second youngest.  Currently, four of the six boys live in relative proximity to each other in the Frederick, MD area, with one living in Georgia and the other living in Florida.  Since Terry would be the last one to turn 60.  Josh, Terry’s son, organized a surprise party and arranged for all of the brothers to be there.  I have to say that it was a privilege to make it to the party.

First, a little background though.  It was not long after Helene and I started dating that she met my dad and his girlfriend Joni.  I honestly believe that Helene is the only woman I have ever been romantically involved with that my dad genuinely likes, and Helene genuinely likes my dad too.  As a result I began spending considerably more time with my dad and Joni after I started dating Helene.  In other words, being with Helene has somewhat forced me to be more involved with my family.  At the beginning I may have begrudged this change a little.  However, I now cherish my time with family and this includes me uncles and aunts.

Back to the party -- toward the end of the evening the six brothers began to reminisce about some childhood stories.  These stories always prove to be very entertaining!  I could never replicate any of these stories in writing—you just have to be there for them!

Around 11:00 pm, my uncle from Georgia and his wife piled in Joni’s pickup with my dad, Joni, Helene and me to head back to my dad’s.  I was really tired and looking forward to going to bed.  However, there would be more reminiscing with my dad and Jim when we got back to my dad’s, after the ladies immediately headed off to bed.  I had the thought of calling it a night as well, but it was such a great day that I decided to stick it out a little longer and learn a little more about my family history—ever since junior college I have loved history and what can be more fascinating than one’s own family history?

While the story telling at the party was overwhelmingly jocular in tone, it was much more serious at my dad’s.   I would learn that most of what my father learned about his father, he learned after his father had passed away.  I had always thought that my dad had a pretty good relationship with his father.  Sadly, this was not the case.   My father’s dad struggled most of his life with alcoholism and would end up leaving this world as a direct result of his drinking.  My dad shared with us about how he refused to follow his father’s example when it came to alcohol—a vow that my dad kept and for which I am thankful.

My dad also shared about his experience at his dad’s funeral.  I remember my dad saying, “There were all these people that just came out of the wood work.”  As one of the youngest boys, my dad had not known his father before drinking became such a big part of his life, and as a result did not know many friends of his father’s.  It turns out that before alcohol took its toll on my grandfather he was one of the most giving men that you could ever meet—he would literally give you the shirt off his back.  Moreover, he was incredibly gifted with his hands and could fix just about anything.  If he heard of a friend or a friend of a friend that needed something fixed he would drop what he was doing to help them out.  Those people that “came out of the wood work” were some of the people that he had helped over the years.

Another really sad story that my dad shared with me, one that I had actually heard once or twice before, was how my grandfather grew up.  He had one younger brother who was favored by his parents.  For a long time my dad knew that his father was a high school drop-out, but he never knew the reason why.  Again, after my grandfather passed away, my dad learned that it was his father’s parents that took him out of school to go to work so that he could finance his brother’s college.  My grandfather’s lack of education would not have an effect on his gift with words though.

My grandfather served in the Army during WWII.  During this time he would write numerous love letters to his wife, my grandmother.  One of my uncles has most of these letters.  My dad has read some of the letters and says that he could not come close to duplicating the emotion and love that his dad had for his mom.   According to my dad, “He was very gifted with words.”

While it is incredibly sad to think about the effects that alcohol had on my grandfather and his children, I could not help but reflect that night on how fortunate I am to be able to spend time with my dad and discuss serious things as well as just be goofy together. 

My dad and I for a long time have been avid whitewater enthusiasts.  In late May into early June of last year I had a week and a couple of days that I will cherish for the rest of my life.  My dad and I got to drive across the country together, well almost—From Washington DC to Idaho.  We then spent a week with friends of Helene and me rafting and kayaking the Middle Fork of the Salmon River.  On our return trip to DC, my dad and I visited the Crazy Horse Monument, Mt. Rushmore, The Badlands, and some other amazing places.  In more ways than one I am sure this trip would have never taken place had Helene not been a part of my life.  For example, those organizing the trip were mostly her friends and had we not been dating I would not have been spending as much time with my dad.

I believe that one of the reasons that God gave her to me was for me to connect with my family more—to show me that family is important and that we are called to connect with them.  I heeded this call and I am truly blessed because of it!

VERY LITTLE RADICAL WITH PLATT’S ‘RADICAL’

“Taking back your faith from the American Dream” is the subtitle of David Platt’s Radical a book that was required reading for a mission trip with my church.  I think “Reshaping the American Dream to incorporate your faith” would be a better fit for this incredibly watered down and uninspiring book.  This is the first book I have read this year that I would not recommend to anyone.  This was especially sad to me since I was really excited about reading it given its title.

In the 217 pages of Platt’s book the only thing “Radical” that can be taken from it is that God might call us to die for our faith.  Admittedly, our American culture of individualism and instant gratification certainly makes dying for one’s faith a radical concept.  Platt even gives several examples of people who have died because of their faith; some biblical and some outside the Bible.  However, I never get the feeling that Platt self-identifies with these examples and does not direct his readers to identify with them either.  Rather, he admires them from afar.

I expected to be pushed and challenged to grow spiritually; to become “radical”.  Instead, I found myself at odds with the author.  Time and time again Platt frustrates me by allowing Christianity to remain in the antiquated, salesman paradigm of the gospel:

1) God Loves you and offers a wonderful plan for your life.

2) Man is sinful and separated from God.  Therefore he cannot  know and experience God’s love and plan for his life.

3) Jesus Christ is God's only provision for man's sin. Through Him you can know and experience God's love and plan for your life.

4) We must individually receive Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord; then we can know and experience God's love and plan for our lives.

Instead of pushing the product of salvation, Platt is pushing the product of radicalism and instead of a four-point presentation he has five points.  To be radical follow this five step program for one year:

1)    Pray for the entire world.

2)    Read through the entire Bible.

3)    Sacrifice your money for a specific purpose.

4)    Spend time in another context.

5)    Commit your life to a multiplying community. (p. 185)

The Four Spiritual Laws and Platt’s five steps to becoming radical include truth and are not bad in and of themselves.  I actually believe the four spiritual laws and while I will not admit that Platt’s five steps are all that radical, I will agree that following them will result in a deeper relationship with God.  However, they smack of an American culture that Christ just would not agree with; it uses market-capitalism to sell Jesus and faith.  We Americans are all about what we get for what we put in and that is not what Christ is about.  Moreover, Platt does not deviate from our American, market-capitalism model.  According to Platt, “If your life or my life is going to count on earth, we must start by concentrating on heaven.” (p. 179)  Shouldn’t we be focusing on Christ?  I love the chorus of Margaret Becker’s song “For the love of you” and it illustrates this point beautifully:

“For the love, for the love of You
Not for what it brings
For the love, for the love of You
Let me do all things
Not for what You'll do
But just for the love of You”

(emphasis mine)

Furthermore, Walter Wink, in his Jesus and Nonviolence, quotes from William Miller’s Nonviolence:

“The issue is not, ‘what must I do in order to secure my salvation?’ but rather, ‘What does God require of me in response to the needs of others?’ It is not, ‘How can I be virtuous?’ But ‘How can I participate in the struggle of the oppressed for a more just world.’”

With the exception of Platt’s statement that God may call us to die for our faith, Becker and Miller detail more of what it means to be radical in a few stanzas and sentences respectively, than Platt does with 217 pages!

I also got the feeling that Platt sees things very black and white.  This leads me to believe that he would refrain from hyperbole when trying to express his arguments.  Perhaps this is an unsafe assumption on my part, but I was confounded with some of the Biblical references that Platt uses in his book.  I would like to share a few.

Platt states “All God’s holy wrath and hatred toward sin and sinners, stored up since the beginning of the world, is about to be poured out on him [Jesus], and he is sweating blood at the thought of it” (p. 35).  Platt believes that God hates us; “holy wrath and hatred toward…sinners”.  Wow, that is news to me.  Second, I am wondering how Platt would define God’s actions respecting Sodom and Gomorrah, the Flood, the Seven Plagues, and many other occurrences in the Old Testament?  I would define God’s actions with these examples as wrath.

I could not help but think of Matthew 25:34-46 when I read this from Platt, “To meet people’s temporary physical needs apart from serving their eternal spiritual needs misses the point of holistic biblical giving.” (p. 195)  Where do we find anything about eternal spiritual needs in this quote from Matthew?

34 “Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. 35 For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, 36 I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me. 37Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? 38 When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? 39 When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’ 40 The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’ 41Then he will say to those on his left, ‘Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. 42 For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, 43 I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.’ 44 They also will answer, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?’45 “He will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.’46 “Then they will go away to eternal punishment, but the righteous to eternal life.”

There is an irony here with American society being overly consumed with materialism. That is, we focus on what we get with Christ; salvation in heaven and neglect the material things that the rest of the world needs from us. The fact is we have absolutely no control over someone else’s salvation. However, we do have much control over what we do with the possessions God has given us and how we use them to further God’s kingdom while we are here on earth.

Finally, I could not help but take issue with Platt’s treatment of Muslims. Platt writes, “I met a Christian brother from the Batak tribe of northern Sumatra in Indonesia. He told me the story of how his tribe had come to know Christ. Years ago a missionary couple had come to his village to share the gospel. The tribe was 100% Muslim. Talk about sheep in the middle of wolves. The tribal leaders captured this missionary couple then murdered and cannibalized them.” (p. 165) Whether we like it or not we live in a pluralistic society here in the U.S. Platt blatantly demonizes the third of the Abrahamic faiths when we should be looking for reconciliation between them.

Frankly, I get really excited to sit down and write a review for a book that I liked or loved. I will more than likely have something critical to say about the books I like and love, and I am not shy about sharing those criticisms. My hopes in sharing them is that they will eventually make their way back to the author and that Proverbs 27:17 will be fleshed out, “As iron sharpens iron, one man sharpens another” making the circle complete. This time, I felt compelled to write this review because I honestly believe that there is simply not much to glean from the pages of Platt’s Radical. If you want to learn what it means to live radically through reading I would begin with Shane Claiborne’s Irresistible Revolution or Walter Wink’s The Third Way.

TEN SIMPLE AND RELATIVELY EASY THINGS TO BE MORE ECO-FRIENDLY

I really believe that God calls us to be stewards of the earth.  It is an undisputable fact that the more than 6 billion human inhabitants of planet earth live in a finite ecosystem.  We can argue about whether or not we are reaching the threshold of what our finite ecosystem can sustainably support.  However, it seems that the current opinion is that we are approaching that threshold at a rapid rate. 

The list below is by no means exhaustive and Helene and I are always trying to find new ways to make improvements in our lives for how we can tread more lightly on the planet.  I would encourage anyone with more ideas to post them in a comment.

1)    If it is brown flush it down, if it is yellow let it mellow.

The largest use of water in homes comes from flushing. Baths and showers rank second. (Link Here)  If you are like me deciding not to flush when you pee can reduce your toilet-water consumption by 75 percent!

2)    Create some habits to thermostat maintenance.

Here are some suggestions that Helene and I have used to lower our utility bills and have less of an impact on the environment.  First, if both of you work away from home with similar hours, have the last one to leave turn the thermostat off; the first one home can turn it back on.  It means that the first hour or so after getting home is either a little too hot (summer) or too cold (winter), but it doesn’t last long and it’s worth the energy conserved.  If it is winter try lowering the temperature a couple of degrees—each decrease of one degree per eight hours can have a 1 percent decrease in your bill!  If it is summer go the other direction.  For further reading checkout this.

3)    Ride a bike or walk to work.

I must confess that I do not do this nearly enough, but Helene certainly does!  Look for a comment to this post soon from me with a rest-of-the-year commitment/goal for days ridden to work.  The energy savings here is a no-brainer, not to mention the thanks you will get from your heart.

4)    Use energy-efficient lightbulbs aka Compact Fluorescent Light Bulbs (CFLs).

It is quite astounding how much energy these light bulbs can save!  “If every home in America replaced just one incandescent light bulb with an ENERGY STAR qualified CFL, in one year it would save enough energy to light more than 3 million homes. That would prevent the release of greenhouse gas emissions equal to that of about 800,000 cars.”  (Link Here) Just to note: there are two types of energy-efficient lightbulbs and one of them gives out a very cold, white, hospital-like light but the other ones are very similar to “regular” lightbulbs.

5)    Bring your own re-usable bags to the grocery store when you shop.

We keep some in the kitchen, and in both of our cars to make sure we don’t forget.  In some locations, they now charge you for bags so there is the added incentive of saving money.

6)    Hang dry the laundry.

You don’t need a backyard with a clothesline for this.  I made a rack in the laundry room with some PVC pipes, and Helene used to just hang all her clothes on her shower curtain rod.  It saves money and energy and it makes your clothes last longer (ever wonder what all that dryer lint comes from?  It’s fabric from your clothes!)  Also, we wash all our clothes in cold water – once again saving money and energy.

7)    Use white vinegar as a fabric softener.

A big thanks to Brad and Ann Marie from AZ for this useful information!  Store bought fabric softeners can contain a lot of unfriendly environmental chemicals, for a list and there effects visit here.  White vinegar makes a great natural fabric softener and is cheaper than regular fabric softeners as well.   And, no it does not make your clothes smell like vinegar.

8)    Pack your lunch and use re-usable containers.

Packing your lunch saves on disposable food containers often used when you go out to buy some food (wrappers, Styrofoam containers, …)  You are keeping a lot of volume out of landfills by using re-usable containers and Ziploc bags. We love our Ziploc bag drying rack. You can get yours here.  This is definitely a practice that Helene is much better at than me.  I tend to eat at the cafeteria at work most days and I do use Styrofoam bowls and plates.  However, I now wash them off and have found that I can get about 5 uses out of each bowl and plate before it really needs to be thrown away.

9)    Skip the bottled water.

I love this quote from the late genius George Carlin, “Ever wonder about those people who spend $2 apiece on those little bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian backward”.  I have never been much of a water drinker myself, but I use to buy Gatorade by the case which is really no different with respect to created waste.  About a year ago I made a decision to buy Gatorade powder.  I now have packets that make a gallon at a time and I use the same container over and over.

10) Borrow Books from the Library

I must say that with respect to this I do not practice what I preach.  I frequently like to go back and look at books that I have read in the past.  Still, libraries are definitely underutilized.  I purchase most of my books through Amazon.com.  I recently began buying used books with Amazon partners and have been very pleased.  It is not the same as going to the library but is better and cheaper than buying new books.

If you are interested in further reading, I borrowed a few ideas from this useful site.